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I have a few tales of drunken glory.
1. I'll start with the pre-drink of this night. I downed a bottle of Vodka followed by a couple glasses of scotch in about 4 hours. We got to the bar and I could barely walk straight, but they let me in anyway because it was my birthday and I knew the bouncers. I was with a small group of my friends and was going pint for pint with my friend when he went to the bathroom and never returned. My buddies left to go to a club and meet the girls we were supposed to meet but I stayed where I was because I was doing well with a girl there. A couple more pints down the hatch and I find myself eating chinese food at 2 in the morning with this girl on the street. I got a message from my friend asking where I was and the most coherent thing I could think of was "Run soup chatch", which is now my catch phrase. I ditched the girl and wandered to the club my friends were just leaving and we got on the bus to go home. On the bus my buddy took of his pants and gave them to me saying "it is better you puke in them then on the bus" so there is a picture of my on a bus holding pants with my buddy standing in his underwear beside me. The next thing I remember i woke up face down, half hanging of my bed with my pants around my ankles and the door to my room wide open while there was an after party going on in my house...I do not remember how I ended up like that. Needless to say I am one great self cock block when I am super drunk.
2. St Patrick's day...this year. The day starts at 10am with the tapping of a keg of Guinness in my house. We start drinking casually till everyone is at my house by 12 and we move the party to the back yard and crack the bottles of whiskey and Bailey's and start downing Irish Car Bombs (Shot of whiskey/Bailey's dropped in a pint of Guinness and chugged). Now I am actually Irish and once had an accent that does come back when I am drunk.We continue at our house until 8pm when we decided to move to my friend's house, which involves us walking through the bar district...we never made it to her house. We ended up in the Irish Pub that we usually go to because they line up was full of stunning girls and we know the owner so we skipped the line and took a few of the girls with us. For some reason girls at the bar tend to talk to me a lot because I guess I look relaxed and friendly and I am not pushy. Since I was half in the bag my accent was in full bloom and I had the envy of all the dudes in the bar wearing the "Kiss me I'm 50% Irish" shirts. I am by no means a player but I figured my ex just left me for another guy so I deserve a little happiness of my own. I spend the first few hours of the night drinking my Guinness and dancing with some girls, everything is going great and for once I am not stepping on my own feet. I ended up going home with a beautiful blonde beside me and I really do not know what happened that night with her but my ex says that I called her around 3am and all she heard was giggling and a little moaning...
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You don't know what it's like to be like me
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